Here and There

My husband and I watched Dito at Doon (Here and There) on Netflix. It is a Filipino movie about how a relationship can be formed despite isolation and lockdown in the time of a pandemic. The ending affected me which is why I had to write about it.

Why was I affected? I think that movie was meant to speak to a lot of people. A lot can relate to the female protagonist, Lena, a very opinionated postgrad student. She was pretty close-minded at the start of the movie. Typical of people who hasn’t been anywhere else. Who has only been exposed to a small world. Caloy, the male protagonist, is someone who’s been through a lot. He’s done a lot of sacrifice for his family and who would do everything for them.

In the movie, they formed a friendship/relationship, Lena was starting to learn how to open her heart up to the point of falling in love. Caloy was struggling in how much he missed his family. He was also developing feelings for Lena. But they never got to define their relationship. Caloy tried to see Lena but they missed each other.

Lena has yet a lot to learn. She would often say hurtful things to Caloy. But in the end, she realized this and she apologized to Caloy. Lena definitely had feelings for him. She even asked him out on a date. She was excited about it. She was finally ready to open her heart and then Caloy ghosted her.If I were Lena, what would I do?

I would definitely tell Caloy how I feel. I would tell him that it was okay. I understand that he was really homesick and that he really missed his family. That I am happy for him that he is now with his family. Then I would tell him how I feel for him. If I think I am already in love with him then I would let him know. Even if it’s LDR at first, it’s alright as long as in the end we have plans of being together. It would still work. It would be hard at first but it will be worth it.

But of course, I would have to look at the practical side of things. Will it really work? Do we have the same background? Will he be able to provide for the family? If there are any red flag then I would just wish him all the best then say goodbye. Move on.

If Caloy is really worth it then he would find a way to keep Lena. Lena, on the other hand, can just learn from this. She would know better the next time. And should be thankful that she did not end up with someone who does not know her value.

What about you? If you were Lena, what would you do?

Response and Pandemic

I have been planning something for years. But something always happens which delays this plan. Lately, I’ve been thinking about this plan again. I asked God about this and last night He gave me the answer. Thank You God for Your answer. Help us do what we have to do.

Another response I received from God was regarding this question I had for Him for almost 10 years now. He told me to let it go. He also showed me why He answered no to this, why He asked me to leave a long time ago.

Also, it’s been 10 years since I’ve given my life to Jesus Christ. A lot has happened in those 10 years. Things I didn’t know if I could surpass. But God has been good to me. He has worked His miracles in me. I asked Him what was His happy, easy gift for me since it’s our 10 years anniversary. But the truth is, just having God around me and feeling His presence is enough. To have peace–that has been so valuable to me. I also want to fellowship with other believers as well. This pandemic has made it harder for fellowship. I just pray that I will be connected to a small group.

Last week I got into watching about airplanes–disasters and first class cabin reviews. It made me miss my family. I wanted to travel again. It made me think of planning reunions to see my family and friends.

But then again, they say that we may have to live with COVID around us. If that would be the case, we need to achieve herd immunity first through vaccination before borders can be opened and we can travel again. I pray that this pandemic ends right away and that everyone comes out of this alive and well.

Waves

I guess for now, I will just have to let time heal my wounds. I’m borrowing these lines from Dean Lewis cause in the corner of my heart, this is what I feel.

There is a swelling storm
And I’m caught up in the middle of it all
And it takes control
Of the person that I thought I was
The boy girl I used to know

But there is a light
In the dark, and I feel its warmth
In my hands and my heart
Why can’t I hold on?

It comes and goes in waves
It always does, always does
We watch as our young hearts fade
Into the flood, into the flood

The freedom of falling
A feeling I thought was set in stone
It slips through my fingers
I’m trying hard to let go
It comes and goes in waves
It comes and goes in waves
And carries us away

Through the wind
Down to the place we used to lay when we were kids
Memories of a stolen place
Caught in the silence
An echo lost in space

It comes and goes in waves
It always does, it always does
We watch as our young hearts fade
Into the flood, into the flood

The freedom of falling
A feeling I thought was set in stone
It slips through my fingers
I’m trying hard to let go
It comes and goes in waves
It comes and goes in waves
And carries us away

I watched my wild youth
Disappear in front of my eyes
Moments of magic and wonder
It seems so hard to find
Is it ever coming back again?
Is it ever coming back again?
Take me back to the feeling when
Everything was left to find

It comes and goes in waves
It always does, oh it always does

And the freedom of falling
A feeling I thought was set in stone
It slips through my fingers
I’m trying hard to let go
It comes and goes in waves
It comes and goes in waves
And carries us away

Gamakay TK68

I purchased another keyboard from Banggood. I decided to buy this because the wireless one I have is too big for my desk. This one is just as big as the keyboard on my laptop. It’s really nice. I like the XDA keycap profile and the keycaps are PBT plastics. Good deal for the price. 🙂 I also love the sound of this keyboard. I ordered the brown switches. I wanted to try the yellow switch. Maybe next time 🙂 This is also hot swappable. 🙂

I am definitely happy with this purchase. 🙂

On Dating

Guard your heart. If you master this then you are good. However, this advice is one of the most difficult to follow. I hope that you do well on this.

I was single for almost 4 decades and through all those years, there are several lessons I have learned. Looking back, I wish someone wise had spoken to me these lessons, then I would have avoided all those unnecessary heartaches.

Love yourself. The very first lesson I have learned. Know your value. Know that you are enough. If a guy is forcing you to compromise or give what you are not ready to give, then leave that person. That guy is not worth it. The right person will wait for you.

Do not chase the guy. Try talking to him. Talk things though. But if a guy does not want to be with you anymore, let him go. If a guy really loves you, he will never leave you. Period.

Do not expect the other person to complete you. You have to be complete in yourself. If you are not happy now, you will still not be happy in a relationship.

Learn to let go. The best way to move on is to allow yourself to grieve when a relationship ends. That way, you can give your 100% in the next relationship.

You always have a choice. You don’t have to stay in a bad relationship. God is not punishing you. Don’t ask Him why He’s given you someone awful. Not every gift is from God. Know when it’s the will of God. He is not the one to blame for entering a bad relationship. You can always opt out. You go into a relationship to be happy and not to be miserable. You go into a relationship so life will be better and more colorful and not the other way around. It is not your destiny or fate. You can always leave. If you are not at peace with yourself because of that relationship. Leave that relationship. No matter how the other person hold on to you, you can always leave. Now it’s a different story when you already marry this person. This lesson is specifically when you are still dating and not yet married.

You don’t have to experience all kinds of love. Learn from the experiences of others. You don’t have to get your heart be broken numerous times. Other people would say that you should have a first love, great love or the one, you can just survive with just one kind of love. I’ve met people who have luckily only have to love once. What my point is, it’s possible.

Don’t compromise your value. Red flag is red flag. Don’t pretend that you are colorblind. Have your non-negotiables and stick to them.

If you can’t marry, then you can’t date. Dating should not be a game. Dating’s purpose is to find the one to marry. If you are not yet ready to get married then don’t date yet.

Always define the relationship. Ask for the true intention of anyone trying to get close to you. Tell the person what you are looking for. Your expectations. If a guy loves you, he will try to attain your expectations. He will pursue you and be true to his intentions.

If you really want to marry, go out there. Date. Get to know people. But of course, guard your heart.

Don’t miss the boat. Sometimes a person will come along who will make you think that he might really be the one. He will ask you to marry him. When that time comes, don’t miss the boat.

The most important lesson is to include God in all your decisions. Pray about it. Right from the start, in every step of the way, pray. Then you will know that your decision, whatever it is, will be the right one. If you do decide to marry that person, give your 100%.

GMMK White Ice

I finally got my GMMK keyboard. So far, I’m loving it 🙂

It’s full-sized and white and it has RGB backlit as well. This is mot likely going to be my everyday keyboard.

Aluminum body. White keycaps. Full-sized.

Customise

It’s been months since I bought my Razer keyboard and it’s only now that I care enough to customise it’s lighting. I appreciate it more now. 🙂

This is my favorite mechanical keyboard so far. 🙂

Logitech G613

I bought another mechanical keyboard on a whim. I suddenly thought what keyboard I would be using if I bought a tablet. I need a wireless keyboard. I just wanted a cheap one, doesn’t matter if it’s linear. I went to my local electronics shop and I saw on their website that a nice full keyboard it was on sale. So I went there to check it out and I bought it. It’s not so cheap but at least I didn’t buy the full price for it. Also I didn’t really like the layout because of extra keys on my left which makes the whole thing smaller than my previous full-sized keyboard. The keycaps are definitely smaller. The switches are tactile though so at least it’s better with typing (according to others) compared with a linear switch.

Downside as well is it’s not backlit, no RGB 😦

I should have researched first before buying this but that’s the whole point of impuslive buying :). Oh well I only need to use this once I have my tablet.

Book Haul

In case you’re interested, I posted a video on youtube about my recent book purchases. I honestly don’t know where my channel is going but I have so many interests, might as well share them. I have a lot to learn on how to speak in front of a camera and how to edit videos. I’m just working with what I have at the moment. I know I still have a lot to learn but that is okay.

Anyway, here is the link for my video. 🙂

Gateway

I finally give in and Joshua couldn’t do anything but agree. I ordered my second mechanical keyboard. Tactile switches. Aluminum body. Group buy. I still don’t fully know how everything works or how to custom built one or if I can ask it to be custom built. But the one I just ordered has everything I want in it–white in colour, full-sized, with RGB backlit and using brown switches. However, it has ABS keycaps which they say are of lower quality compared with the PBT caps, but the one I am currently using has ABS caps which are still nice. It’s not wireless though but that is alright. I can work with that. Reason why I got really into finding my ideal keyboard is because the clicky switch can be annoying especially when you are trying to beat a deadline and you are trying to think and all those clicks are in the background. However, brown/tactile switches still have a sound but at least they are a bit deeper than the green switches.

They say the keyboard I’ve ordered is a gateway to more luxurious keyboards; hopefully not.

After this, I don’t think I’d be that obsessed anymore with mechanical keyboards. But maybe the next one I’d be eyeing is the one in pink. Razer Quartz…hmmm too bad it’s in green switch if they have it in yellow/red switch then I’d be sold, then I would have already completed all kinds of switches (linear, clicky, tactile) 😉