Dig a Ditch

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

One of my favorite verses in the bible.  A few days ago I was worried about what’s gonna happen to me next year.  While walking to work, I was reminded of this verse.  I will keep on holding on to this verse.  For I know that God is faithful and He will stick with that He said.  God has always been faithful to me.  He has always been good to me.

I have been depressed for the past few months, I could not really move.  You could even say that I have given up.  But I am already here.  There is no turning back.  I have long burnt the plow when I chose to be here in Australia.  Now I have to keep on digging ditches.  But along the way I got discouraged and got exhausted.  It is hard because I feel so alone.  I am looking for a spiritual family but people are a bit complacent.  But just because they are does not mean I have to be like them.  I just have to continue.  Keep on digging the ditch even if the water is not yet there.  Prepare the land for rain.  Build the ark.

People say hurtful things about me and that is the challenge.  Didn’t Nehemiah and the Israelites heard taunting when they were building the wall?  But here is where faith will come in.  Choose faith.  Choose life.

Faith in action.  It’s painful but if I really have faith, I will do this.

I saw a green motorcycle yesterday and it reminded me of my brother.  It reminded me of my family.

Right now I have to continue on digging the ditches to prepare for God’s blessings in my life.

Right Now

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14 NIV

I want to serve the Lord–to do great things for the Lord.  But it’s hard.  I feel so inadequate and so unfulfilled.  I have been doing and searching and praying.  I am looking for a spiritual family here.  I have been asking for prayers.  I feel so dry and thirsty.  My hunger cannot be satisfied.  I feel like I am not doing enough.

I hated myself for just remaining to be a potential and not an actual.  I want the fulfillment of God’s will to happen in my life.  I want to obey and to follow and surrender to Him completely.

I feel like my effort is not enough because I am not doing enough.

And then I heard this from a preaching and it struck me:

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’ (Matthew 25:23 NIV)

Many voices are telling me that I am not good enough.  I am always doing it wrong.  But I should start small.  I am going back to the start.  What can I do for God now?  And then I was reminded.  Write.  Write about God and the passages–share verses.  It may seem small but who knows who may be touched by the Word of God?  Keep on planting seed.  It does not have to be grand like preaching and public speaking or leading a small group or reaching out to others, but right now I can share God’s Word through messaging, multimedia–blogging, twitter, facebook.  I am doing this for Him because I want to contribute to the advancement of the Kingdom of God.  All I want from this is to please the Lord because I want and seek His approval.  While I can still write and read and while there is still the internet–I will do what I can.  Time is of the essence.  Hopefully I will be able to reach more people and be courageous enough to always be the first one to reach out to others and to encourage others.

I want to glorify God in everything that I will do.

I am resubmitting my life to You Lord God.  Here I am Lord.  Use me Lord.  May You be glorified through my life.  In Jesus mighty name.  Amen.

Miracle

I don’t know much about dogs. But yesterday I encountered a miracle.

I was in a hurry escaping the church people because I don’t feel like talking to them.

Along the way I saw a white and orange bulldog with harness playing with the sidewalk plants on the other side. I thought to myself, he’s preoccupied. I gotta be quick before he sees me.

Before I knew it, a white small poodle was running and barking towards me. I was trying to shh him but he was not threatened. I had no umbrella to defend myself. I would have thrown the hot chocolate with me but then he suddenly ran away. Before I knew it, the bulldog came running towards the poodle to shh him. The poodle still wanted to chase me but the bulldog was there to shh him.

Wow!!! I was running away from the bulldog but it was the one who saved me.

I was running away from church but it was the one who is going to support me. God is still watching me.

This encounter is a reminder from God. That He has me in the palm of His hand. He is the One taking care of me protecting me.

I will not give up. God even if You do not change the situation, please change me. I refuse to believe what others say about me. I am going to God and I will listen to Him. God is too faithful not to grant me His promises. God is too loving to leave me alone.

God is good all the time!!!

Next Year

I wonder where will I be next year.  Still here in Tamworth?  Australia?  Philippines?

I was feeling so down as I walk to  work this morning thinking about where would I be next year.  But last night I watched series of testimonies by celebrities and a verse that they like is from Jeremiah 29:11 which is:

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

God has a plan for me.  He will  complete that in me no matter how hard it may seem.  I have faith in Him.

Faith in Action ] Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.Hebrews 11:1 NIV

God is good all the time

I have started at the other store today.  God is good. 🙂

I have the encouragement I need last night.  It was a blessing to press play that youtube video of Pastor Steve Furnick.

Thank You Lord for Your encouragement.

I was also thinking for the past few days about how I would ask God for one thing but instead of giving me that–He gave me several things.  All I wanted was a relationship with one person, but instead God gave me relationships with all these people.  God has been so kind to me.  He provides me with all that I need.

Lord God I pray for peace and joy in my heart. 🙂

Radical

How would I know if one is a christian?

If the person is radical–may not be perfect but radical.  Someone willing to give up everything for Jesus.  Someone like His apostles, someone like apostle Paul.

I heard that some people were laughing at me at my ideas–because I could be radical/melodramatic.  But they don’t understand.  It hurts but that’s part of the deal.

I am a risk-taker when it comes to love.  That part of me I hope God can use to share the gospel.  Just like apostle Paul being a radical person–up to the point of killing early christians before he met Jesus at the road to Damascus.

I am in a place where people are a bit complacent and will only hear what they want to hear–sadly I am being complacent as well.

I have been reminded again:

For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear (2 Timothy 4:3 NIV).

The bible is a book that presents reality–the good and the not-so-good.  It should be taken as a whole.  I’ve been aching for a spiritual family that i can count on here–for encouragement.  But sadly, the culture here is different.  So I have to encourage myself–I have to listen to podcasts so I would be reminded of the people passionate about God.  I have to fellowship, trying to get what I could.  I have to look for it.  I should not give up.  I should try to find my way in this different world.  I believe God puts me here to make me grow–to deepen my roots so it would be anchored around God.

I’ve got to learn Whom to listen to.  I gotta know His voice so I won’t get lost.  Out of the many voices in my head–I have to distinguish which is God’s.

The main point that I am driving at is I want to give my all to God.